Welcome to New York, Bitch!

Look at my Twitter... go ahead. I'll wait...

All right, if you want to know the story, you've got read the blog.

I woke up at 7:30AM this morning and got in a quick workout before enjoying my free continental breakfast of Frosted Flakes and a mini muffin.

Gabriel was still asleep when I got in the shower, but was up and working when I got out. We had planned to leave at least by 9AM, but Gabriel wanted to work on some paperwork that otherwise he wouldn't be able to work on until after MonsterMania. So we stayed until checkout time at 11AM.

Once we hit the road, we only stopped twice. Once to get gas, and the second time to get gas and pick up some lunch for the road.

Getting to New Jersey was cool. The toll booth guy had a thick accent which I loved: "Hey, howzzit goin'?"

Even hitting the Lincoln Tunnel was cool, and when we popped out on 42nd Street and drove passed Broadway and Park Avenue, I have to say I got excited. I shot a lot of footage of all the craziness. Seeing all the billboards and stores and cinemas and people... it was fun.

Then it happened.

We had to get to the Midtown Tunnel. We saw signs that said TURN LEFT to enter. But as soon as we started turning, I noticed that there were two lanes: one for cars and one for trucks and buses. But it was too late to turn that big mother over the THREE FEET to the right in order to get in the correct lane.

As soon as we turned in, a cop on foot flagged us down. He was motioning for us to stop. Gabe, knowing the weight of the truck and the blind spots, went into a controlled slow stop. Well, the cop didn't see it that way. He charged us and yelled at Gabe: "What the fuck are you doing?! You don't fuckin' see me?!." He told us to move over to the side by a wall. Honestly, there was a PATH for wayward trucks to pass through in case they went the wrong way. This cop was just pissed because Gabe didn't stop fast enough.

He yelled at Gabe some more and accused him of almost running him over. Gabe explained that he was just stopping slowly because he couldn't tell if anyone was following close behind him. "You think I give a fuck about the car behind you?" Was the cop's reply. It was ridiculous. But we played like gentlemen and let him say whatever he wanted to say. Then he told Gabe he wanted to search the back of the truck. Gabe said sure, but told the cop that there wasn't a door and the only way in was the hatch. He got pissed at that! It's like we didn't build the thing! He told us to wait. And wait we did, for nearly half an hour. Gabe asked me how long I thought they'd keep us there. I told him flat out that their job tonight is to just stand there anyway. They could keep us sitting there as long as they wanted. The cop finally came back and asked to see my ID. I gave it to him and he approved. He gave Gabe a ticket for "ignoring" the five signs that told him the correct lane to enter. He then told us that we had to switch places and I had to drive. Not sure why, but we didn't question it. We just wanted to get out of there.

Our next mistake came when we exited the Midtown Tunnel. Since I thought they were going to search the truck, I packed up all my stuff so it would be easier to get out. I was navigating on my laptop with my wireless signal on Google Maps before we got pulled over, but we didn't have time to boot it up again before we reached the next toll both. We asked the guy there and he told us to get on the L.I.E and where to exit. Only problem was that when we pulled out, there was no sign that said L.I.E. It wasn't until we went the wrong way that we saw another sign in the distance that said L.I.E.

So we drove around a, lets say, questionable neighborhood, trying to get back to where we were. We finally did and I missed it again! We looped around, and luckily made it on this time. We had three sets of directions going by this time. And again, we missed the easiest route because the signs on the road aren't named the same as in Google. So we called Gabe's friend who told us to exit Queens Blvd. After a few miles, we saw it... it was CLOSED. We spent the next hour trying to find another way to get here. There are just so many One Way streets and Dead Ends, it felt like we'd never find the place.

Once we got here we just vented as we retold the story to Gabe's friend. We settled down with some cold pizza and even colder beer. We feel better. Got it out of our systems. But it was just a suck-ass way to start off my first trip to New York. I mean, I truly was excited when we entered the city and that just quickly faded. But tomorrow is another day. I'm looking forward to the convention and meeting a few more people. We have high hopes as far as promoting and selling.

It's ironic how I was most worried about lingering in small southern towns, but it was in a big metropolitan city where we've had our only trouble. Here's to a better tomorrow.